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"UHE JCTOR SAT 

JJND OTHER 

"POEMS 




ONE %OUND CHESTER 




The Heany-Bryson Company 

PUBLISHERS 
422 First Avenue, Pittsburgh. Pa. 



Copyright, 1915 

THE HEANY-BRYSON CO. 

Pittsburgh, Pa. 



ICIA4U904 



OCT II J9I5 



THE ACTOR BAT 

I WANT TO BE AN AcTOR BaT 

to act around all day, 
to show the people merry times 

When they are feeling sad; 
To GO UPON the stage at night 

And DO SOME funny stunts, 

I WILL MESMERIZE THE PEOPLE 

I WILL MAKE THEM THINK I'm GRAND; 

to see me in my stage clothes 

They will pay a thousand shillin' 

The girls will love me just as sweet 
As I LOVE their fine spondulix. 

I made a date to meet a girl 
At half past six, one night, 

I gave her the address of the Opera 
House where I was showing at. 

She called on Manager Evans 
And then enquired of me, 

He said he's on the stage right now, 
Just step inside and see. 

It cost her fifty cents to see 

Her fair straight-ja-c&et King, 

She swore she'd never make a date 
With an Actor Bat again. 




GUILTY? 

1 AM NOT WANTED ON EARTH, ^ 

A HARD WORKER FOR GoD WAS I, 
I AM NOT WANTED IN HeLL, 

WHERE WILL I GO WHEN I DIE. 

The DRUNKARD, THE GAMBLER, 

They put me in jAft, 
They trumped up a charge, 

1 FOUGHT tooth AND NAIL, 
O WHERE WILL I GO WHEN T DIE. 

Is THERE NO WAY TO GET ME OUT FftjEE, 

And capture the guilty 
That blamed it on me, 

O where will I GO WHEN I DIE. 

Those men who would convict me 

And sentence me, they lie. 
Punish them well when they reach Hell, 

O where will I GO when I die. 




/ PAROLiL 

It seems so long since last 1 stood 

Within my good old home, 
,-, When Mother pressed her lips to mine 

And I left her all alone; 
And when they took me from her side, 

Tears down her cheeks did roll, 
But I WILL kiss them all away 

When I get my parole. 

The Years are growing old you know, 

And so is Mother, too, 
But you can bet, when I get out 

I'll stick to her like glue; 
I'll work for her both day and night, 

I'll pick or shovel coal, 
I'll do this all for Mother's sake 

When I get my parole. 

This is my first and so my last, 
f""' For me its been enough, 
IBut just to keep my record clear 

I've taken many a bluff: 
But bluffs with me count not at all, 

I'd even sell my soul, 
I'll prove my love for Mother Dear 

When I get my parole. 





THE MINE DONKEY 

a nigger drove a donkey 

In Shannon Number Three, 

DaT nigger drove DAT DONKEY 

'Till dat donkey couldn't see. 

DaT nigger took DAT DONKEY 
Tg^HE BLACKSMITH SHOP, 
_ s^ME FINE REPAIRS 
'UT UPON HIS TOP. 

Dat SMITH DONE TOLD DAT DARKEY, 

Dar's ONLY ONE THING TO DO, 
Dat's place a couple HEAD-LIGHTS 

WhAR DAT MULES EYES COME THRO. 

So THEY PLACED A COUPLE SHINERS 

On DAT donkey's brow, 
And they printed on one, 

Get ready to run 
For DAT MULE has worked out in the mines. 



BALL DAT CABBAGE DOWK 

you can talk about stealing chickens, 

When you steal them on the sly, 
Running a chance of losing your life 

And you don't go to Heaven when you die. 
Ball dat cabbage down, 
Ball dat cabbage down, 
Yaa black gal don't give me any sass 

but ball DATtABBAGE DOWN. 

i had a little banjo 

The strings were made of twine. 
The only thing that I could play, 
Was — I wish that gal was mine. 
Ball dat cabbage down, 
Ball dat cabbage down, 
Yaa black gal don't give me any sass 
But ball dat cabbage down. 

1 HAD A little YALLOW GAL, 

I BROUGHT HER FROM THE SoUTH, 

She ATE SO many sun fish 

The sun shone in her mouth; 
1 took dat gal to the blacksmith shop, 

to have her mouth mad^ small, 

And A3 THE BLACKSMITH TURNED AROUND, 
She SWALLOWED THE SMITH AND ALL. 

Ball dat cabbage down. 
Ball dat cabbage down, 
Yaa black gal don't give me any sass 
But ball dat cabbage down. 

Nigger had an overcoat, 

He hung it on the wall, 
Nigger stole dat overcoat 

And wore it to the ball. 

Nigger had a bull dog, 

As blind as it could be, 
Nigger chased dat bull dog 

As far as it could see. 

B/»^L DAT cabbage DOWN, 
BalS DAT CABBAGE DOWN, 
Yaa BLACK GAL don't give me ANY SASS 
But BALL DAT CABBAGE DOWN. 



1 MET A LADY 

1 MET A LA0Y, 

I MET HER IN A FIELD FAR AWAY; 

I SAID — Hallo, 

She said — My Joe 

Won't you be my bo? 
1 SAID — I'll try 

If you don't die 

Like my other wifie did. 
What is your name? 

My NAME is Sadie; ^ 

What is your age ? 

My age is eighty; 
Who is your mamma? 
Mother Salome; 
Oh! Sadie Salome 
Go home! 




ONE ROUND CHESTER 

As I STEPPED THROUGH THE ROPES TO SEE, 
A VERY GOOD MAN IN FRONT OF ME ; 

The REFEREE WAS MiKE La Vell, 

He called us up and this did tell: 

N'O HITTING in clinches, NOR HITTING LOW, 

And I'll stop the bout if you figkt too slow, 
It's a fight to the finish, so fight it well, 

And take your corners when you hear 
the bell. 

ROUND ONE 

We bore right in like a house aflame, 
For that's how Chester won his name ; 

There was nothing to do but fight like sin, 

He played for my stomach and I for his chin. 

As HE RUSHED IN, FOR I MADE HIM LEAD, 

I SWUNG ON HIS NOSE AND IT SURE DID BLEED; 

He COUNTERED MY NEXT AND SLIPPED ONE THROUGH, 
And LEFT ME AN EYE OF A PURPLISH BLUE; 

But I CAME BACK AND FINSIHED HIM RIGHT, 

And that is how I won the fight. 
PURSE! 




THE ACCIDEiNT 

The fate of a Driver, down in the mines, 
Was known to be great for his bravery ; 

Standing on the front of his trip one day, 

Coming down the mountain like a great 

STEAM sleigh; 

Down at the bottom they struck something soft, 
'TwAS A poor innocent man they ran over top ; 

The fate of a Driver, let no one tell, 

Who sleeps tonight in a murderer's cell. 




A MATTER OF DRESS 

C) Darling, do not wear that dress, 
Of white of silk and blue, 

wear that dress of calico, 

I love you better to. 

This world is changing fast, My Dear, 
Too fast, too fast for me, 

1 CANNOT greet YOU IN A DRESS, 

Of white of silk and blue. 

O Darling, do not call me Jess, 

O call me Darling too, 
And wear a dress of calico, 

And I will love you more. 




FINIS 

1 WAS talkin' to Pal 'tother day, 
In fact he was talkin' to me, 

How I've worked out and fought 
For the-coin that it brought, 

And how lucky I don't seem to be. 

For the money's not in square fightin' 
At least so we've all been told, 

So I've taken to verse 

On my very slim purse, 

Thro' a Printer less wise than he's bold. 




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